LCGB Forums

It has been suggested to me on several occasions that I should write an Oily Rag article based on members stories of roadside bodges that have got you home.

You might not want to write the whole story here, but you could write "I used a cable tie as a throttle cable", or "I used a meat pie as a packing for my end-can" (even though this is ridiculous when you can eat a meat pie instead). I might follow it up with IM or a quick phone call, and you'll become very famous by being mentioned in Jetset.

So come on, let's here what has got you home.

Back in the early 70's my throttle cable snapped in the headset several miles from home. Fortunately back then I used to run without the panels on so I pulled the inner through and tied it around the brake pedal so that I could push on it sideways with the heal of my shoe. Once I got going it was quite effective and a lot safer than the prospect of getting my pillion (girlfriend) to operate it

My throttle cable snapped on my cutdown in the 80's on the way home from a rally. Usual story, miles from anywhere, no chance of anywhere being open so I took my lace out of my docs and tied a knot in one end and threaded it through the carb slide, I tied the other end to the legshields and activated the throttle with my foot. After a few miles I got used to it and managed to get the 90 odd miles to home.

God bless 14 hole docs

Coming back from Bournemouth on the M1 back to York at night (early 80's) my back light blew (not lamp and couldn't fix it). taped a torch to my seat facing backwards and put a Prawn Cocktail crisp packet over it for the red effect. Got pulled by plod who praised my ingenuity and let carry on with no ticket

Great stuff lads. Keep them coming.

Did anyone ever fix a holed piston with a nut and bolt?

Got to agree with you there Eden, went in 69 vowed never again.

Back in the early 70's a crowd of us were going from Exeter to Bristol and half way there my spark plug blew out. The threads had been getting progressively knackered and this was the final straw. No matter how many times I screwed the plug back in it blew out when I kicked it over. We were near a petrol station and the only stuff they had that I thought might stand a chance of keeping the plug in was a body filler called Plastic Padding. I smeared the plug threads with the stuff and screwed it back in and let it set for about 20 minutes. Scooter started first kick and got me the rest of the way to Bristol and back without any problems but I did take the head to be helicoiled the following week.

I had the same losing a needle circlip at the side of the road whilst setting a scoot up. After looking on the road and swearing a lot I looked in the toolbox and the only thing in it was a plastic bag so I tore a strip off, wrapped it around the clip area on the needle and jammed it in the slide. It got me home ok and actually seemed to run better.

Excellent Wack.

Eden, top stories. You may be extensively quoted, though I may need to temper your language FFS.

Any more?

Couple of bodges to standard carbs that lasted for ages.
Thread had gone on the choke adjuster so wound cotton thread into the thread and screwed it on as normal.
Slide had worn where the pin went in so some lad from Oxford IIRC wrapped some insulation tape around the bulb on the pin, worked for a couple of months until I scrounged a replacement.
One of the lads lost a choke spring at the side of the road so we took one out of a ballpoint pen and used that.
Back in my v*spa days I didn't carry spare cables so ended up tying a throttle cable to my front crash bars and using my foot to press on the cable as if it was a pedal.
On several occasions I've jammed a worn out plug cap on using wire, insulating tape and cardboard in various combinations

It is curious how many of these bodies are carburettor related.

In Sweden, one of our group got fed-up with his rubber mounted carb falling off the manifold, so he superglued it on. Problem solved, and it was still glued on many months later. Success.

^ lol... i was looking at the photo yesterday ....i must add ...the collapse of the bearings was my own fault, as id "modified " the PM disc the week before

No my scoot , but i did contribute to the "bodge"

So what do you do when your in the middle of Belgium , and you loose your locking ring ? BTW this was his second ring to go missing on this trip the first was only noticed, when his wheel came loose on a french motorway .... luckily he noticed the second one missing at a service station . When he told us, he was white as a sheet , i think partly because he realised he 'd had a lucky escape, and partly because the van with all the spares had left us, to go home a few hours before.
So where can we get a locking ring and an M7 grub screw ? ....in the middle of belgium ???

After a little lateral thinking , we came up with this ,a shocker half nut , then the hub nut locked up tight, an M7 exhaust stud and nut , a hub extractor bolt, an M8 nut and finished of with the bodgers staples, a cable tie and gaffer tape to hold it all together

We managed to convince him that it was "probably" more secure than Innocentis solution




He did another couple of hundred miles like that , it didnt move

Again not my scoot .....ive withheld the names to protect the guilty !

So you've just got to france about to start a 2000 mile journey , a bit of maintenance before a long days riding. Check gearbox oil , but dont tighten the level plug up too much or the top might break off ! doh .........no spare .......hmmm so assess the possible things that could go wrong ? well it could now unscrew it self and come out and loose all your gearbox oil.......or it could screw itself in and lock the engine up
A few ideas were bandied about , locktite it ? gaffer tape on the thread and lock it in ? ....or file a groove in it, an fit a cable tie around the engine, and locate it in the groove, preventing it from turning ......this did about 800 miles until we got to Avignon when a new one was purchased

bent my kickstart shaft at Hayling last year, got home with a wine stopper and the cap off a gear oil bottle

Thats so good

yep,i like that .......but ive got to ask ? .....wine stopper ? .....now, i have seen a few people drinking wine at rallies , but .................taking a wine stopper with you ?? thats a bit posh isnt it ? lol

[list=]An 80's one again, the threaded rod in the coil snapped and the HT lead fell out. I stuffed the foil from a fag packet in the hole and wedged the lead in with match sticks. Lated years.
A bungee to replace a snapped tank strap.
A bungee to replace lost stand spring.
A rear hub extractor with garden wire wrapped around it to hold a lock washer on rear hub.
Nuts and bolts on front a rear hubs.
Wire in card needle.
Front brake cable re routed to become a clutch.
Torch as a headlight and the brake light fixed on when light switch failed going to Avignon.
Mixed alcohol spirits to top up petrol tank to get home from a party (80's)
A self tapping screw in the top of a piston with a small hole.
A pair of boxer shorts as exhaust baffles (last see on the M4 as a flaming missile)
Jubilee clips to hold an end can on.Super glue on a spark plug with a dodgey threaded head.
Glue on a barrel stud where the trhead had gone on the block.
Cut Inner tube as a gasket for a float bowl.
A sliver of metal wedged down the side of a woodruff key where the crank slot was worn
[/list]

Chemical metal is a fine material, I'm carrying some in my toolbox now after my exhaust problem on the way to Austria

Barrel stud pulled most of the thread out of the casing. Applied araldite in the hole with a matchstick and wound in an 8mm bolt coated in grease. when set I took out the bolt(hence the grease) and reassembled the top end and off home.